What We Repeatedly Do

What We Repeatedly Do

For our recent weekly exercise, Astha asked us to observe and identify three areas where negative emotions tend to repeatedly appear. Aristotle writes, "We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, therefore, is not an act, but a habit." From this thought it seems logical to conclude that the expression of negative emotions as a repeated act also turns into a habit.

If you do not wish to be prone to anger, do not feed the habit; give it nothing which may tend to its increase. — Epictetus

Why is the non-expression of negative emotions so important? The energy contained in a negative emotion is a powerful raw fuel. It is clear to me that there is no escape from experiencing negative emotions in life and there are countless ways that they creep into my everyday activities. According to the Fourth Way, if negative emotions did not exist, they would have to be invented, created to be used for, and transformed into a higher purpose. Negative emotions are the raw material with tons of energy that can be intentionally used to raise my awareness, to shake me out of my sleep, and when properly channeled, evoke higher states.

If you cannot stop anger, at least do not express it. — Ibn Arabi

So, in this post I will share with you only three of many areas that I find the energy of negativity ready to be discharged like the pressure release valve on my espresso maker. One area where negative emotions tend to repeatedly appear for me is while I am in the midst of meeting a deadline for a project and unexpectedly my computer fails, locks up, or a power surge causes the system to reboot, and I lose data. Sound familiar? I can count on that environment to activate negativity in me every time.

We think that negative emotions are produced by circumstances, whereas all negative emotions are in us, inside us. This is a very important point. — P.D. Ouspensky

The second area where negative emotions tend to repeatedly appear is when I have to call a service provider to make changes to my account or cancel an Application that advertised “free for seven days” and I am not able to speak to anyone but an Artificial Intelligence (AI) representative. I have had experiences where I spent an entire morning on the phone holding or trying to get ahold of the phone company because I needed to speak to a representative. The phrase “kill the messenger” comes to mind because by the time I reach a real person, I burst into all sorts of negativity, anger, complaints, frustrations, etc. Again, this circumstance predictably challenges me and my aim not to express negative emotions.

The third area where negative emotions tend to repeatedly appear is when I disagree with someone and they repeatedly try to convince me that their point of view is the only right way of thinking or doing something. I am often okay with not reaching a definitive answer in a conflict or seeing different sides of the same issue. But to be commanded or compelled to agree with another person’s perspective can be a recipe for negativity to seep through the cracks if not outright loudly expressed.

Whatever one may have excellently practiced can be defeated by one burst of anger. — Gampopa

Now my hope is that after having expressed this so publicly here on Facebook, there will be a memory of identifying these areas as “flash points” and I will have more chance to use the negativity rather than uselessly purging the energy that is created by the computer failure, the AI representative, or the disagreement with others.

Nothing is easier than expressing negativity and nothing is harder than transforming it into presence. — The Teacher

I recently read an essay on negative emotions and the author said that he was finally able to transform them by finding a more powerful attitude to put in its place. The attitude was gratitude for the privilege of self-knowledge, resulting from Self-Remembering and Divided Attention.

The three pillars of awakening are self-remembering, divided attention, and the non-expression of negative emotions … Only the expression of negative emotions makes us old. —The Teacher

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The Desparate Man, Gustave Courbet, 1843